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Thirty-five years of therapy couldn’t stop the pattern.
Understanding every psychological reason for dysfunction doesn’t mean it ends. As they say in recovery, self-awareness will avail you nothing.
The low level of self-awareness drives shame and isolation. You compartmentalize, create a secret life. Deep down, you know you need to hide it. You’re not ready to confront it, so you hide it from everyone. You become an expert at presenting one face to the world while living something entirely different in the shadows.
Sometimes Earth School doesn’t knock gently. Sometimes it sends a comet.
My guest today is Elizabeth Gilbert, author of the global phenomenon “Eat, Pray, Love.” For 35 years, she used people the way others use substances—as sedatives and stimulants, endlessly seeking what she calls “love, attention, validation and acceptance” from external sources. This pattern culminated in her buying cocaine from teenagers in the East Village for her dying partner, Rayya Elias. Her new memoir, “All the Way to the River,” chronicles this darker journey.
“I have always used people the way other people use substances. There are people who I have used as sedatives, and there are people who I’ve used as stimulants.”
- ELIZABETH GILBERT
Today, we discuss:
- Sex & Love Addiction Recovery
- Losing Her Partner to Cancer & Relaps
- Why Radical Honesty Heals Everything
- 6 Years of Celibacy as Self-Care
- From Purpose Anxiety to Presence
For those who prefer a visual experience, the conversation is available on YouTube. As always, the audio version streams wild and free on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.
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Peace + Plants,
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- Connect With Elizabeth: Website | Instagram | Facebook
- Book: All the Way to the River: Love, Loss, and Liberation
- Book: Eat, Pray, Love
- Article: The New York Times: Elizabeth Gilbert Gets Dark
- Article: The Washington Post: Elizabeth Gilbert’s new memoir might shock the ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ crowd
- Article: The Times: Elizabeth Gilbert: ‘I came very close to murdering my partner’
- NPR: Elizabeth Gilbert no longer believes she’s a bad person
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Thank The Team: I do not do this alone. Send your love to Jason Camiolo for audio engineering, production, show notes and interstitial music; with additional audio engineering by Cale Curtis and additional music by Moby; Blake Curtis & Dan Drake for video, & editing; graphics by Jessica Miranda & Daniel Solis; portraits by Davy Greenberg, Grayson Wilder & Gizelle Peters; copywriting by Ben Pryor; and theme music by Tyler Piatt, Trapper Piatt & Hari Mathis.
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